bad taste in the mouth

My cat Callie has had some horrid breath for awhile now. I was finally able to take her to the vet. After blood work and an exam, she was diagnosed with gingivitis. What a pain in the mouth. The worst part for her is the nasty liquid antibiotic that she has to take twice a day. I keep it in the fridge and was told to add artificial sugar to help aid in the flavor. She absolutely hates getting that medicine squeezed into her mouth every 12 hours. While that antibiotic tastes horrible, it's much better then the pain she'll continue to feel in her mouth and gums. Actually, without meds the pain will only get worse. I realized sometimes in life we have to swallow some nasty things in order to get healing from the pain and disease.

Another Year Older

I turned 30 again this week! Spent the day helping others and going to the doctor. If my memory is correct, I believe I went to the doctor last year on my birthday. Happy Birthday to ME! If getting sick is going to be my present each year, I don't want it! I was tested for strep, but it was negative. Somehow it always it. I'm not so sure those swabs are accurate. While it seems I battle constant sickness and allergies, I really don't have the right to complain as I watch people around me who are very sick. Sickness that antibiotics and zyrtec can't fix. My Father-in-law, Jim is battling cancer. He was diagnosed September 1, 2010 and for the most part the past year has been pretty normal. Jim's health had remained steady and side effects from his chemo had been minimal. Until a few weeks ago when they discovered that the chemo wasn't working as it should. The doctor put him on a new chemo that caused him horrible mouth soars that had to die down before he could start taking the pill everyday. Once that happened, he's been doing ok on the medicine. His health is changing though. That can't be denied. He is now showing physical signs of pain and has a persistent cough. All due to the cancer. Because of these things, the doctor had him go through another round of scans yesterday to access where he's at with tumor growth etc. Jim will get those results on Monday, December 5th. We continue to pray for Jim and healing here on earth but the cool thing is, no matter what...He's ok with whatever happens. Jim knows his reward is great in Heaven. What a glorious thought!! All 5 grandchildren are helping Jim and Eleanor have an early celebration for their 40th wedding anniversary tonight. The kids will present them with a candle lit dinner, serving and waiting on them. The kids are excited! I can't wait to get pictures of this event! I know Gracie is very excited to play 'waitress'! This will be precious memories for all of us! We're not sure what the future holds with our family but we're certain it's in God's hands. We're also certain that we, as a family, will treasure our moments together. Thanksgiving was a good time together and Christmas will be a great time together! All the times in between and after will be special as well!

'I think it's cute'

When talking to my neighbor today, who is an older man, apparently I said the word 'crap'. Later in our conversation he brought it to my attention and said, 'it's funny that you said the word 'crap'. I like that about you. I like that you're spunky and say what's on your mind. I actually think [the word crap] it's cute'. What a compliment! More than once in my life I've been told I'm spunky, honest (even too honest), mouthy, blunt and even rude. God made me a unique individual as he did you. There's no doubt that I was created to be spunky and sometimes loud or mouthy. But there is a time that I have to be careful to control my tongue. Just because I'm wired to be rude or blunt doesn't give me the excuse to play those cards anytime I feel like it. It's hard! Taming the tongue is one of the hardest things for me to do. When I get angry, you'll probably know it. If I'm stressed, it will come right off my tongue. I'm very aware of this. It's on my mind a lot. I'll admit, sometimes I forget and so spout off. But, for the most part, I really am trying to say less and listen more. I know sometimes it doesn't seem like it. I've also been told I don't act like 'a normal preacher's wife'. I take that as a compliment as well! But, on the bad side, when my tongue has gotten out of control, I've been reminded that I wasn't 'acting like a preacher's wife'. Although I do want to set an example, please never put me on a pedestal. Please never elevate me (or anyone else) above yourself or anyone else. As soon as I mess up, you're going to be disappointed and say 'that's not the way a preacher's wife should act'. How do I know this? Because it's happened...more than once. I'm human too. I serve the same Jesus that you do. I'm covered by grace just like you are. I just happened to have a husband who, as a family, we've been called to ministry. So, while I may say what I'm thinking I never intend to be rude or mean hearted. Sometimes we say things with good intentions, but they come out with the wrong tone. I do this one WAY too often. I can be joking and saying something funny and someone be offended. I stop and ask, "WHAT?" Well, my tone was ugly and my joke sounded serious or mean hearted. I'm trying to be very aware of this. The bible warns us that 'For out of the fullness (the overflow, the superabundance) of the heart the mouth speaks.' As hard as it is to admit, when I have a bad attitude and ugly words are flowing, that means my heart is ugly and bad too. I will probably never walk on egg shells for people, but I will try to meet them where they are at and respect them. I will never change who I am completely. because as a child of God, I'm just this way. But know that I am aware and that I realize that it is a personal struggle for me. James 3:8 'But the human tongue can be tamed by no man. It is a restless (undisciplined, irreconcilable) evil, full of deadly poison'. So, let me warn you now.....there will come a time that I will make you mad with my words. I will probably hurt you or offend you. Hopefully never on purpose, but I am a messy, messed up person who serves a perfect Saviour. And that's all I have to say about that!

OH CRAP!!!

I was in my REM sleep. Dead to the world when I heard Winston meowing from the other room. It took a few meows for me to realize 'HE NEEDS TO GO OUT TO USE THE BATHROOM"! Winston is technically an outside cat, meaning he stays in at all times, but uses the bathroom outside. He doesn't have a liter box in the house. When I opened my eyes I immediately noticed the sun light coming into my window. My inner-head reaction was OH CRAP!!! I knew if the sun was out, it was past 7:15, which is wake up time for school. I was frustrated because my alarm didn't go off. 'Why didn't my alarm go off?' I asked myself. 'What day is it that my alarm WOULDN'T go off?" These thoughts and questions all happened within a matter of seconds. I grabbed my phone, checked the time, 8:01 AM. My inner voice became my audible voice and I yelled 'OH CRAP! Now we're late for school and the cat needs to use the bathroom. I blinked my eyes, collected my thoughts, looked at the day and date on my phone......SATURDAY!!!! AHHHHH, (this is where I'd normally go back to sleep for hours) BUT, remember, the cat needs out. Because we now have a huge, 90 pound, 3 year old lab, Winston can no longer go in the backyard. We are gradually letting him in the front yard trying to get him used to staying around the house, not going into the neighbor's yards or the road. He was used to having free roaming in the backyard because of our privacy fence. As you can sense, I'm a little protective of my four legged, long-haried baby. I 'walked' the cat (this is where if I had a cat leash, I'd be using it), got him back in, ran the dish washer, swept the floors, make a cup of coffee, and got back into bed to enjoy this warm cup of goodness!! Happy Saturday!!

We made it!

CITYChurch has now had 2 public worship experiences. Our first week, Oct 2, 2011 went really well. There were only a couple very minor things that went wrong. Honestly, I didn't know if we'd be able to pull set up off, much less a service. God was so good to us, so faithful. We were able to go in on Friday night for an hour to set up as much as we could, and an hour early on Sunday morning. This saved our butts. The second week came, again we were able to come in for an hour in advance. We got almost the whole kids area and connection table/cafe area completely done in that hour. It left us with finishing up the worship area and some odds and ends here and there. So, those week stressed me out. I thought they were going to be difficult. Turns out, they were pretty much a breeze. It's THIS Sunday that I have reason to worry over. We don't get to come in Friday and we don't get to come in early Sunday morning. We get there at 8:30 and must have everything ready for full service by 10:30. We have 1 1/2 hours to get everything done, so we can chill for a bit before all things start! I'm nervous, I'm not gonna lie. But, if I stop and worry over it, all it does is make me scared and in a bad mood. This is allowing Satan to have a victory. I had to go to the doctor today because I started feeling yucky Wednesday night. I'm now on antibiotich and hoping to be strong Sunday. We already have people out of town so I can't afford to be sick. My body and voice need to be strong. Praying God has me completely healed and ready to go Sunday morning! We've been so blessed these past 2 weeks. We have a handful of people who are in....sold out.....on mission! We desperately rely on our team. We'd be gonzo without them! I thank God for the people he's put into our path. We're praying for more people to step up and help us set up/tear down and be a part of our CITYGroups. It's all a process that we can contribute to but ultimately have no control over. Come see us soon!

Overwhelmed

It is literally overwhelming what all God is putting in our path right now.
Overwhelming can be a good and bad thing. Right now, it's both. We are overwhelmed with blessing as well as overwhelmed with 'curse'.

We are in the midst of starting something new in our city and meanwhile Satan is fighting it. He is tugging at Chris, he is grabbing at me, he is pushing my kids around. I DO NOT LIKE IT!
We are safe in Christ's arms through it all, and I know we'll continue to bring Glory to God in all things. But man, it's tough. I don't think I realized the boxing match I'd be putting myself and my family into when we checked the 'yes' box for church planting.

Please don't hear this as complaining, it's not. But it is our life right now. We are asking God specific questions like, what are we supposed to do with this person, or this situation? How are we supposed to jump this hurdle? Why me? How can I be used in this situation that's for YOUR Glory?
Please be in constant prayer for the Jones family and for CITYChurch.
This IS tough stuff!

So much things to say

Today I've sat down to write something several times and had nothing to say. I'm actually feeling that way right now. I have so many thoughts in my head. I have such a heavy heart and yet can't seem to get it out. It's not that I don't want to write, I'm simply speechless. This NEVER happens.
Maybe as I try to explain, my words will come.
Honestly, I believe my lack of communication right now is because I'm stunned. Simply stunned at what Satan can do in people's lives. Don't get me wrong, I've been equally stunned, shocked, excited about what God has done too. But the past few days it's just one blow after another in friends' lives.

I had the pleasure of 'reconnecting' with a friend after not talking for almost a year. Things happened that caused a separation between us, not by my choice. None the less, the choice was made and now God is bringing her back into my life. Do you want to know why she's coming back around? Satan. Satan got into her home and into her husband. I say this, knowing she would completely agree. Her husband allowed Satan to feed him lies and he ate everyone of them up. He has now left and is pursuing 'other options'. She now needs people whom she can reach out to who will love her as she's broken and healing. What allowed what once seemed to be a Godly man to become so distracted? So full of lust? So proud? So hard? So selfish? So deceived? So disconnected?

I also have two friends right now of very different lifestyles, ages, backgrounds, genders, and passions who are finding themselves bearing the responsibility of bringing a baby into their lives. Single parents now faced with life changing decisions. There's no 'redo' or 'take back' on that one. There's no 'oops'! This is a baby they must now deal with, love, raise, shelter, protect, and show how to love God. Can it be done? Absolutely!! Is it the end of the world? NO! But I have to question again, Godly people making poor decisions. How did they become so distracted? So selfish? So full of lust? So hard? So proud? So deceived? So disconnected?
Satan is such a master of disguises and it angers me to pieces how he sneaks in on people. How he creeps into small crevices like a cavity then before you know it, there's decay. Thankfully our souls and lives, like a tooth, can be restored.

I'm watching with my own eyes one friend as she is being restored in Christ as she carries her growing baby in her belly. I'm listening to another friend as she's being restored as she's filing divorce papers. Both of these woman are seeking God's will and are closer to him now than ever. They've seen destruction in their lives and have had to come to an understanding of it and are ready to put their lives into God's hands and simply say 'you're in control'. My girl friend told me that her husband leaving her and their 2 small children was huge, but God is SO much bigger!

Please pray for these three friends of mine. Pray that a cheating husband will find his way back to God, the lover of his soul. Pray for the two 'soon to be single parents' that they will raise their children in the truth of Jesus, the lover of their souls!

Matthew 11:28
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

John 8
“If God were your Father, you would love me, for I have come here from God. I have not come on my own; God sent me. 43 Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. 44 You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies. 45 Yet because I tell the truth, you do not believe me! 46 Can any of you prove me guilty of sin? If I am telling the truth, why don’t you believe me? 47 Whoever belongs to God hears what God says. The reason you do not hear is that you do not belong to God.”